The Only Thing We Have to Fear....

...is fear itself.

Today, the California State Supreme Court ruled that it will NOT grant a stay on its previous ruling to allow same-sex marriages, pending the November election. So, marriages will begin June 17 and continue until/unless the November balloted constitutional amendment passes; that proposed amendment would alter our constitution to specifically state that marriage can ONLY exist between a man and a woman. For more info on the decision, check this out: http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2008/06/04/BA8V1137HS.DTL&tsp=1

This is all, of course, simply back-story for what I am wondering today:

WHY are people so afraid of other people being different from them?

It is that fear of difference that has sparked some of the most ugly, lengthy, bloody battles of all time; there are religious wars (Jews/Muslims, Catholics/Protestants, Christians/Non-Christians, you name it), ethnic/tribal wars, political wars. I have blogged before about the fact that I am told I am going to hell for having been raised Catholic (by fundamentalist Christians); why do people who believe in a merciful God think it's their place to tell me that I don't get something as good as they do, once I die?

What in the bloody hell are people afraid of?

I am afraid of an abundance of disease and a lack of good, affordable health care; I am afraid of the world being a worse place for my incredible children than it was/is for me; I am afraid of waking up some day and finding that, after years of age and gravity, ALL of my sexually-related body parts are going to be centrally located. These all seem like rational fears to me (really - that whole central location thing has me worried).

But I am NOT afraid of people loving each other and wanting to commit to each other and live happy, productive, coupled lives. Heck, that seems like a no-brainer to me; what is there to fear in that? And yet, I see comments like this one from Campaign for California Families, who claims that "the plague of same-sex marriage will soon spread rapidly across the nation." First of all, for the edification of the CCF (although I never thought that hatred was a family value, so I'm not so much in agreement with their name), a plague is "an epidemic disease that causes widespread death." OK, lexicography aside, what is the issue here? Why are they afraid of homosexuals? (substitute the word of your choice here - heathens, people of color, liberals...)

The fear is that people who are different from them will be happy, productive, and viewed as "normal." Why is this frightening? Because if someone who does not hold their narrow-minded beliefs can be a great member of society, maybe, just maybe, these fear-mongers are wrong?? Then, everything they live their lives for, everything they use as a shield against rationality, everything they use as an excuse for prejudice and hatred, falls away and leaves the simple truth: they are simply mean-spirited, spiteful snots.

But it doesn't have to be scary. We can all be wrong together, or right together, or simply accept that probably none of us has the real answer, but we all have a piece of the solution to the puzzle inside us. What a great world this would be if we respected and celebrated people's differences instead of fearing and distrusting them; if we worked together on the puzzle to try to make all the pieces fit. Think about it. Please?

And finally, congratulations to my incredible sister and sister-in-law, Paula and Julie. They will be tying the knot (finally!) on June 23. Their marriage has been put off until now not because of a lack of love or commitment to each other, but because of a lack of love and rationality on the part of the citizens of this state. Certainly, their marriage will prevail and endure because of their love for each other and the abiding love of their friends and family for them. I am proud to love them both. Mazel Tov!